Me: How's it going, old man?
Max: Bye, older lady.
Me: Where are you going, short person?
Max: Haha, very funny. You're smaller than Christian.
Me: Yeah, but I can still sit on him. And I can sit on you, too.
Max: Yeah, but you're just a midget.
Me: Too bad for you, since you have the same DNA.
Max: DNA? Who cares about DNA?
Me: Let's move on to another subject. What would you like to talk about?
Max: Something you don't want to talk about.
Me: Like politics?
Max: Maybe something different.
Me: Let's talk about unicorns. How many unicorns do you think it takes to make one unicorn burger?
Max: See you later.
Me: What? Did I upset you? Does the thought of a big, juicy unicorn patty make you cry?
Max: Wait, I need to go to the bathroom. For about, like, forever.
Me: Hmmm. Must have had beans for dinner.
(Several minutes later)
Me: Were you rapping in the bathroom?
Max: No! Maybe. Yeah, I did.
Me: That seems like a fun bathroom activity. What are your plans this weekend?
Max: Sleep, uhhhhhh, and other stuff.
Me: Sounds fun. I'm ready to go to sleep right now. How about you? You could get started on your weekend.
Max: Great! I'll do it a couple hours after you do.
Me: I may be funny, but I'm not stupid. Go to bed, you short little old man.
Max: Oh yeah? I think I can do more math problems than you.
Me: What's one little boy plus one bedtime?
Max: Equals Mom sleeping and little boy partying.
Me: Wrong. It equals 73.
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8 comments:
Random and flipping hilarious, as usual!
HILARIOUS! My favorite line..."Wait, I need to go to the bathroom. For about, like, forever."
Loved listening in on a sweet bedtime conversation of a mother and son. Thanks for sharing!
Dang, I was close, I thought it was 72! I'll have to check my calculations again.
THANKS FOR POSTING!!!!!
I love it when you post! You guys are hilarious.
Funny post.
Dad
Hello!
Just started reading some of your blog posts! I love your enthusiasm. And this post is hilarious!
I can't wait to read some of the posts I see about advice for writers. I am an aspiring novelist as well (aren't we all) and have started my own blog to help me keep my writing up. It's definitely a work in progress since I have never blogged before, but if you ever have free time, check it out:
http://niki1likar.wordpress.com/
Best,
A friend in Canada
I can't believe I never posted a comment. This is so funny. I need more banter in my life.
I think maybe your boy is just. like. you.
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