Thursday, January 28, 2010

Limp Lettuce

It's been a lot of limp lettuce around here in the writing department. I can't get a decent blog post to squeeze out of me, and when it comes to my bookus (think fetus), I've been stuck in the middle of a stale scene for days. The characters are on the verge of picketing and calling the union on me.

But the kitchen has remained clean! The counters are wiped down and the floor got a steam bath yesterday!

I'm all about imbalance, borrowing time and energy from some important part of my life to feed another. Teetering on the edge of knowing what I'm doing and second-guessing everything. When I'm frustrated creatively, my practical side vacuums and dusts. If I'm running away from writing, I find solace in the laundry. It makes me feel less guilty to be slacking off creatively if I'm using the time to tidy. Quit nagging me, Creative Side, I'm doing something really important! LAUNDRY IS REALLY IMPORTANT! Sheesh!


If you ever come over and the sink is piled with three-day-old dishes and there's no clean socks, you can be sure that I'm on a writing roll. Or that there's been a Project Runway marathon on TV. 

It's a classic case of robbing Peter to pay Paul, except that Peter and Paul were big-hearted disciples who preached about forgiveness. I'm robbing Martha Stewart to pay Judi Dench, and you don't want to mess with either of those chicks.

The problem with imbalance is that I'm forever letting some piece of myself down. I'm in constant apology to Neglected Things I Should Be Doing. Is this the plight of every adult? At least the women? I jalopy my way through every week. On Monday morning, I'm determined to finally get it right, but when I close the door on Friday, I'm shrugging my shoulders saying, "Oh well."

Is it because I want and need to be doing too many things? Or because I don't get enough whole grains? Or is it because I never read any of those Stephen Covey books?

I think I'm going to make a study of Snoopy the dog; he totally seemed to have it all together.

25 comments:

Miranda said...

Wow, I was just sitting down to write a similar post but am quite positive I wouldn't have done it as eloquently as you. I know exactly how you feel.

I never read those Stephen Covey books either. Does that make me ineffective?

Kristina P. said...

I could really use some more whole grains.

Meg said...

This spoke right to me! I have been feeling the same way too.

I blame January.

Christy said...

limp lettuce? - hilarious but so untrue! I can't think of anything I'd rather read on any given day than one of Tiffany's posts. They are the dark chocolate of chocolates, every one of them!

autumn said...

I can completely relate! I love the bit about Martha and Judi, because it's true. You don't want to mess with either of them.

Becky said...

You are too hard on yourself. ANYTHING you write has a certain magic to it! You could simply write the ABC's and I would love it (and I would secretly wish I was as good a writer as you are!) We love you, dirty dishes and all!

shawn said...

i heart snoopy.

Ginnie said...

I think you sound completely normal... well, except for the cleaning part. Normal people don't clean (at least that's what I like to tell myself)

Soul-Fusion said...

at least you keep posting funny stuff anyway!

As for me, I think I need more antioxidants. I'm still not entirely sure what they do but I think I could use some anyway.

The Coolest Allen Family said...

I love that you used the word "jalopy" in your post. Such an underused word. I think I will find new and exciting ways to use this word from now on. Thanks for the inspiration! See, now your counters are clean and you inspired someone to be creative. You should feel complete....well at least for a minute or two.

R. said...

Limp lettuce is the absolute perfect description for that feeling. I've been having it a lot lately too!

--xo.

Jesse C said...

I know exactly how you feel. Keep at it, and it will come. Staying busy is a good thing, but maybe try to do some things outside of the normal routine here and there. It might spark some inspiration. Go into a store that you've driven by a million times but never visited. Or do something like that. Discover a new great band. That's all I got.

Lindy-Lou said...

You might try immersing yourself in a cold bath. Isn't that what brings the crisp edge back to limp lettuce?

Thanks for validating my present state. You're wonderful

jennie w. said...

Try forbidding yourself to write for a week. I know that if I'm not allowed to do something I automatically want to do it RIGHT AWAY!

Artax said...

You know, my counters are kinda grimy here. Anytime you feel a bout of writer's block coming on, my kitchen would love to have you visit....

Kami said...

I really like Jennie's idea. You should try it. As for my, I'm in a blog funk too...just following my dorky schedule so I don't have to think. Probably because I'd rather do laundry. SHEESH!

Katie H said...

I totally understand where you're coming from...but, then again, I've been thinking we women in general are too hard on ourselves. So you drop one area for a bit to focus on another. No person in their right mind can juggle everything perfectly all the time. You know, unless they're insane or something. I say give yourself a break/breather if you want to.

Annie said...

Your problem is that you are normal--which I don't really consider to be a problem at all. Furthermore, based on the fact that someone above called your writing "the dark chocolate of chocolates," I'd give myself a break and a pat on the back if I were you.

If, however, you are robbing Martha Stewart to pay a drug dealer, then you have a problem.

Really Wild West Mama said...

Tiffany...I've decided this feeling is part of the Last Days Syndrome!

I can just imagine Heavenly Father gingerly pushing the Fast Forward Button! (remember the scripture that speaks about "those days being speeded up?!") THOSE days are HERE!!!

Being mortals, we're just having a hard time "keeping up"!!!

Kellybee said...

I think we are always hardest on ourselves! I love reading your blogs...I admire your honesty. One thing that always seems to help restore any creativity that I possess, is a jaunt in the wilderness...the mountains are very healing to me. I know you love Amish country. A cruise with the Amish ( and some of their yummy food might lift your writers block!)

Ali said...

It's a girl thing. That's my excuse and I'm sticking to it.

Angie said...

I've enjoyed your latest posts, but I get what you're saying. Don't feel bad about any of it. People spend too much time feeling bad. If you let your kids starve, then that's something to feel bad about. Otherwise, no worries.

Kate said...

When I'm stuck on anything (math, writing, music etc.), the cure is always to drop it for two days and read a refreshing book. Always works. I recommend reading "Flush" by Carl Hiassen. Loved this post! (And every post. And your bookus.)

MiaKatia said...

I love this post! In fact I would have commented on it earlier, but I felt like even my comments were losing their luster. I get where you are coming from. I have to agree you are the dark chocolate of writing. So even when you feel like you are writing Hershey's instead of Godiva, just remember it is still always better than tootsie rolls.

Omgirl said...

I've come to the conclusion, after thinking about this exact subject many times, that the only way to do everything you want in a week is to sit down and schedule out your entire day, minute by minute, so that you can fit everything in. Of course, this will take a whole day to do, so you'll start out the week a day behind and will have to catch up somehow.

Or you can sell your children and poison your husband. That usually helps free up some time too.

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