Monday, September 27, 2010

Didja hear the one about the lady who flew to Poland by herself?

That's right. I'm flying to Poland by myself. Ryan will already be in Poland, which will make him unavailable to fly with me. I'm not really worried about flying by myself. I've done it before. However, I do get occasional butterflies when I remember that I will have to switch planes in Paris and find baggage claim in Warsaw, when I speak neither French nor Polish. Oy vey! (I do speak a little yiddish. Will that do me any good?)

Ryan will already be in Warsaw, teaching a course at Warsaw University to Polish grad students with one of his colleagues. I will join him at the end of his teaching and then we're going to tour Warsaw, Vienna, and Prague. It's going to be an adventure, for sure, not to mention for my mom, too, who is flying out to stay with our kids when I leave. She assures me that she has no worries about managing the kids, but she is terrified of getting lost on the way to our mailbox. She comes from the land of wide, straight roads, and, well, we don't.

I've asked the neighbors to watch out for her, to offer directions and even escort her if necessary. The fact that there is a GPS in the car seems to bring her no comfort. The fact that the sun rises in the east and sets in the west provides no relief. The fact that I'm going to provide her with a list of addresses of any and every place she could possibly need or want to go offers her no solace. However, the bulk case of signal flares I ordered in the event of her getting lost is giving some peace of mind. I have also advised her to wear reflective neon clothing and to leave a small trail of breadcrumbs everywhere she goes.

I know it's not always wise to blog about upcoming travel. However, I am confident that I have taken all necessary security precautions. The house will be protected by our alarm company, our terrifying guard dog, and our short-tempered Samoan bodyguard, Mewannacutchoo.

Everything's going to be fine.

19 comments:

Kristina P. said...

Wow, what an awesome adventure!

Hil said...

How exciting! (For you, your mom and Mewannacutchoo). Can't wait to hear all about it.

Mia said...

Wow, that sounds incredibly cool! Have fun. I can't wait to hear about the trip.

marta said...

wow, tiffany.. this sounds so exciting. what a memorable vacation memories you two will make. you'll have to get tips from my mom, marty. she went to poland just last year! the signage is hilarious, as they are so difficult to attempt to pronounce! i hope you'll come back with travel diaries.

kami @ nobiggie.net said...

Can I fly in your suitcase? What an adventure!

YOU-CAN-DO-IT!

Kim said...

Super fun adventure! Have a great time.

Unknown said...

I'm jealous! I hope you'll have a grand adventure.

Becky said...

You are going to do just great! Just act like you know what you're doing, right? :) I totally get your mom's worries. I get so turned around in your neck of the woods- I have no idea how you do it!

Alyssa said...

pack snacks - for the plane, for wandering around strange cities, for hanging out on trains and in airports, etc. You'll probably discover lots of fun new snacks there but I always take a few things because nothing is worse than being lost and starving!
You are going to have the best time!

Christy said...

Ohhh, I can't wait to hear about this!

Ann Marie said...

just stumbled upon your blog, and i LOVE your writing. can't wait to hear about your adventure!

Angie said...

That does sound exciting! It'll be beautiful.

I do know some French, and have been to Paris, so if you want pointers just let me know.

Anonymous said...

Mewannacutcho????Hillarious.

Hannah said...

Your body guard sounds scary.

Have so much fun!! Poland! How exciting!

Travelin'Oma said...

You're going to some of my favorite places. I'm so jealous! I loved Poland. We were in the Krakow area so I don't know Warsaw. I bought some of the most unique painted toys and crafts there. I wish I'd bought everything! It was cheap and one of a kind. My advice: BUY IT ALL!

Suzie said...

dang. I have so many inappropriate jokes that I could share about the polish. in fact a whole BOOK of them.

good luck and have a wonderful time!

(and to your mama too!)

Anonymous said...

Have a wonderful ADVENTURE!!!!
heidi b.

Kellybee said...

Wow, Tiff! That sounds like an awesome adventure for you! I would be terrified to travel out of the country on my own, but excited at the same time...you learn so much about yourself when your completely out of your comfort zone. My mom has a pen pal in Austria near Lake Fushel...I think that's how you spell it...it's nearly midnight and I've been surrounded by children all day, so my brain is fried! Anyhoo...take lots of pics, and post them so we can all be very envious of you! Be careful and have fun!

Shua said...

Way to go. I'm in the library CRACKING UP because of Mewannacutchoo.

Seriously though. I'm pretty sure everyone around me thinks I have a strange disease. Probably called Mecan'tstopcrackingup.

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